“Winners and losers have the same feelings, they just take different action.”
-Rob Gilbert

Well, it’s Saturday morning at 9:32am and in about 28 minutes I will be speaking to the Ferris State Professional Tennis Management students, staff, alumni, and prospective students.

I’m nervous.

But I get nervous before every talk, so I’m fine with it. It’s okay to be nervous, as long as you don’t look or act nervous. Winners get nervous too, but they don’t let it paralyze them. Losers do.

So before a match, musical performance, or presentation before your class or co-workers, remember it’s alright to be nervous. Someone once told me, “If you’re not nervous, you’re not ready.”

Thanks for reading.


“Life is not a talent game-it’s a strategy game.”
-ROB GILBERT, Ph.D., Professor of Sports Psychology, Montclair State University

Today’s message is especially dedicated to all my loyal blog readers.

This is Message #600. Is this a big accomplishment? Some may say yes. While I am certainly excited that this is #600, by no means do I think that I have made it. Arthur Ashe said “Success is a journey, not a destination. The doing is more important than the outcome.” I am doing what I love and trying to make a difference; and I am definitely enjoying the journey.

One of the keys to success and mental toughness is that you can do anything with the right strategy. If you have seen me give a lecture, you know that I perform magic tricks, to prove this point. The strategies to my 600 messages were that I was committed to posting them every morning, I enjoyed doing them, and I did it whether I wanted to or not.

Focus on the process, not the product.

Click on the link below and see if you can figure out the strategy to this test given to 2nd graders in China. You have two minutes. Leave your comments.

Thanks for reading.


Today’s message is especially dedicated to all the student-athletes trying out for high school spring sports this week.

One of my favorite things to do is study extremely successful performers – elite athletes, CEOs, musicians, presidents, doctors, and students. I have found that one thing they have in common is this…


Last night I was on a tele-seminar on focus with Dr. Rob Gilbert and Mike Schwartz. Physical skills take a while to develop, on the field, in the classroom and at the office, but you can instantly become better by changing your focus.

What are you focusing on?

Basketball players, while taking a foul shot, should focus on a specific part of the rim. However, the ones that miss are focusing on something else, like the crowd or that they may miss the shot.

Many people tend to focus too little and think too much. This is called paralysis by analysis.

We need to focus, but we need to focus on the right things, such as the process versus the product. The process is your effort, strategy and attitude. The product is winning.

When you focus less on winning, you actually win more.

When practicing, studying or reading, do it for 15 minutes, then take a break. Repeat. We can only focus for a certain period of time and by taking regular breaks, we can stay focused for longer periods of time.

Multi-tasking was also a topic of discussion. We can do between five to eight things at one time, but we can only do ONE thing well.

Focus on one thing. The right thing. And go all out.

So good luck to all of you trying out this week and remember what FOCUS stands for…

Follow One Course Until Successful

Thanks for reading.


Today’s message is especially dedicated to all the great students and staff that I spent time with yesterday at Montclair State University.

Some people consider me successful.

Want to know a secret?

Nobody rang my doorbell and handed it to me…I took action. I created the life that I now live.

So you shouldn’t wait and “see what life brings.” Instead, figure out what you want and start taking action.

Yesterday I had a very powerful day – for many reasons.

I spoke at the great Dr. Gilbert’s class at Montclair State University with some amazing people. Coach McCarthy was there. Coach Ventre was there. Poet, Dennis Howe was there. Colbert, an up-and-coming actor from Brazil was there. Melissa Sapio (perfect 4.0 in college) was there.

After that, I attended Professor Sapio’s psychology class because they had a paper due on “Game. Set. Life.” I spoke to and received feedback from these great students. A young man named Jose said my book “rocked his world.” How can you not get energized by that?

I’m a very motivated person, but just being around these inspiring people brought me to another level. Motivation breeds motivation.

One of the things that I learned yesterday was that Emily Dickinson NEVER published her poetry! She kept her poems hidden in a closet and after she passed away, they became published.

So what are you hiding from the world? What kind of life do you want to create? Why aren’t you starting today?

Thanks for reading.

Reminder: Tell everyone you know to purchase a copy of “Game. Set. Life” on my birthday, October 26th on Amazon. Don’t do it for me…Every book I sell on that date will be matched with one donated one book to an inner-city child in the National Junior Tennis League of Trenton. Help make a difference.


Today’s message is especially dedicated to the great Robert Greene.

You can make or break a performance by the thoughts that arise in your mind. The winners and losers feel the same feelings but they take different action. Tiger Woods, Derek Jeter, and Roger Federer all get negative, so it’s alright if you do. But it’s what they do when those thoughts arise that make the difference.

Here’s a tip to stop those performance killing thoughts from the book, “Good to GREAT GOLF,” by Dr. Rob Gilbert and John Sikes, Jr…

The Rubber Band – Put an elastic band on your wrist, and every time you become aware of a negative thought, snap the band against your wrist. The sudden quick pain will “snap you out” of the negativity and remind you to get your focus back on track.

You’ll never totally get rid of negative feelings, just make sure you accept those feelings, and then “snap” out of it.

Thanks for reading.


“Nothing ever happened in the past; it happened in the Now. Nothing will ever happen in the future; it will happen in the Now”

-Eckhart Tolle

“Champions do what they need to do, when they need to do it, whether they want to or not.”
-Rob Gilbert, Ph.D.
Sports Psychologist

“One of these days is none of these days.”
-author unknown
“To get what we’ve never gotten, we must do what we’ve never done…start today!”
-Ed Tseng
Author of “Game. Set. Life.”

Thanks for reading.